why do i feel so lost, i have great family and a great husband pero i still feel na i am not myself most of the time. control freak daw ako, it seems ilag sila sa kin but i don't know.
i have dreams but they are centered to my family, actually i have no dreams for myself, para bang if i ever attempt to make one for myself, i feel guilty about it, it seems selfish... ahhh it is hard. i feel conflict within myself. i just want to be happy, i know i already gave a lot to the point na i really don't have anything na. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i hate myself. i feel jealous whenever i see somebody who loves themselves, who is a bit selfish, who does not care about how their love ones live. why am i so affected about everything?????
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Why do I have time for everybody except my own?
Why I made them happy and secure and not myself?
Why do I have to ask somebody to permit me to do something for myself?
Why do I work so hard earn a lot and have nothing in the end?
Why I have to do things for everybody and have not done a thing for me?
Why can’t I be selfish and do not feel guilty about it?
Why do I always feel that the world is my responsibility?
Why can’t I just pack my bags leave and go to a place where I do not know anybody?
Why can’t I just lie down and not think of anybody else?
Why can’t I just die and not think of anything else?
I guess I am tired, tired of everything, tired of being there for everybody except for myself.
Oooh I wish I was done, I am done with this life because I feel like I have reached the end,
There is nothing else I will have to do I am done with this life,
I have given everything I got and I am tired there is no more I can give.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)